You know what they say….women always visit the restroom in pairs. Perhaps that is why my dad built a two-seater outhouse in the woods behind our cabin on Bello Lake. My sister and I usually went together when we were little girls. We were in and out of there as quickly as we could possibly…er….”go”. She was afraid of the big hairy wolf spiders and I was afraid of the bears. We weren’t just regular run-of-the-mill scaredy cats though. There really were big hairy spiders in there that we would sweep away with a broom at each visit and paw prints of a long-ago curious bear on the wall of the outhouse that reminded us that there really were bears in those woods. The bear must have walked in the wet clay soil before standing on her hind legs and peering in the window because her paw prints were a permanent fixture on the tar paper that covered the outside wall. Once the clay dried, the prints stayed for years. I overheard Dad and one of my uncles saying that the bear must have stood over six feet tall by the looks of those prints. At least that’s what I think I heard. Perhaps the bear got taller each time we showed off those prints to summer visitors. We would stand with hands on hips, looking up at the prints and bravely say, “Yep. She’s a big one, all right,” while secretly hoping we wouldn’t be the bear’s breakfast that weekend.
When my husband and I were looking at our present little farmhouse and property, we noticed that there was an outhouse in the back yard. It is rather hard to miss because it is not off to the side in a private area, but right smack dab in the middle of the back yard. It was probably strategically planned by a long-ago Farm Wife as a reminder to her husband that there was no need to tromp through her house in his barn boots every few hours. Although the outhouse is not used, each spring the snow melts around it first and the grass is always greener and thicker around it. I’ve often wondered if any pilots flying over to the Bowstring airport have thought that bright ring of green grass to be some sort of strange crop circle or something. I’ve thought about it turning into another chicken coop or perhaps a storage building but since we have both, the outhouse is right there for anybody to use. If they want to. It might come in handy if we ever have a big party or if the septic tank should ever freeze. Let’s hope that never happens, as I am more the indoor plumbing/whirlpool tub type of Farm Woman.
My sister and I now own the cabin on Bello Lake and it hasn’t changed much over the years, except for the new outhouse. It is not far out the back door so you no longer have to follow a path through the woods. It is only a one-seater. Once you sit down, there is a lovely view of the lake through the window. I don’t stay in there long enough to enjoy the view, though. I’m in and out, as quickly as possible. First, a good sweeping. Next, I check under the seat for big hairy spiders. Last but not least, I am always, always on the lookout for bears. Yep. There’s some big ones out there.
As I was reading your post I mused on the idea of making a small shack with a half moon in the door to house my garden tools inside… I also remembered a two seater I had seen that was converted into a little hen house! The ‘seats’ had been rigged into nesting holes and it was very funny to see the hens settin’ inside! ~ Lynda
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Your outhouse had a liftable seat—how modern of you! My Grandpa in Warren, Ohio (yes, the Finnish one) had a single seater in town for the males. The females were treated much more genteely–a tin bucket with a lid on it in the inhouse bathroom. Loser on the chore chart got the honor of emptying the can daily. Excellent incentive for completing your chores in a timely manner!
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How nice to let the ladies go inside! :o)
Thanks for reading, Jan.
chris
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My husband told me his uncle had a big family and built a 5-seater! Our church had a 3-seater. Kids, now-a-days, will never know what it’s like to have to “go” on a cold, frosty morning. Brrrrrrrr! Especially with nothing but last years catalog to use. 😉
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Five??? Have never heard of that, and I’ve been in many!
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Me neither but he swore it was true. He said his uncle had 15 kids and got tired of one of them screaming for the other to get out of the outhouse.
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Lol!!!!
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