Right in the middle of her forehead

February 26, 2012 by The Minnesota Farm Woman

Twenty-five years ago I moved to the nation’s oldest city and started working in the intensive care unit at a small hospital located at the water’s edge. As a new employee, I was relegated to the night shift. Every morning, we would stop what we were doing and watch the sunrise over the bayfront. Sometimes we would see the dolphins playing or a manatee’s humped back as she swam by, enjoying the morning’s sunrise as much as we did. We would then turn back to our work, which most days wasn’t pretty. Men and women who choose nursing as a career usually have more of a calling than a choice. We are called to take care of people, and in doing so, we take care of not only patients but their families and friends. In doing this, we sometimes gave up time with our own families. People still get sick and need care on Christmas or Thanksgiving or when your baby is taking his first steps. Disease and illness know no boundaries and are not prejudiced against race, wealth, or religion. Disease happens, and we took care of it. We fought it with every inch of our souls. Nursing is not something easily turned off when you clock out at the end of your shift. All of us at one time or another had sleepless nights worrying about a patient or wondering if we had done everything we should have or could have done. We often found humor in the strangest circumstances and we would laugh until we cried. Sometimes we just cried. We dealt with death and dying more than we wanted to. Sometimes dying takes a long time and sometimes it comes much more quickly than anybody is ready for. We were there for both. We had a little superstition that was used long before any of us became nurses. When someone was in the dying process and nothing else could be done, we would quietly crack open the window to let the angels in. Even those who didn’t quite believe in angels knew it couldn’t hurt. ICU nursing was one of the hardest things I ever did, and it was also one of the best things I ever did. We saved many more lives than we lost, and we rejoiced in each one. We worked hard. We played hard. Sometimes we kept ourselves going with black coffee and saltines pilfered from the kitchen drawer. Sometimes we ate like gourmets. We were of many different ethnicities and would often have potluck dinners with a variety of foods from different countries. We would eat on the run, because each and every time we planned a party or a potluck dinner we would get a full-code from the ER or a drunk who wanted to pick a fight. When we could sit down to eat, we would talk about things that would spoil the appetite of the most stoic stomach. We learned to respect each other’s religion, ethnic background, and politics. We learned that despite the high-tech world of medicine, nothing works like good old-fashioned teamwork. We learned that we may not get a day off if help was needed. We learned to rub each other’s shoulders on a busy day. We learned that nursing and nursery rhymes have a lot in common: When days are good, they are very, very good, but when they are bad they are horrid. We were there for one thing, and that was to take care of the health and well-being of our patients. Along the way, we learned to take care of each other. A new hospital was built, and we no longer had that lovely view. The city grew, the hospital grew, and we grew along with it by learning and changing as often as health care changes. Some of us embraced change, some of us did not. Last night, we had a reunion of these nurses, along with a few other members of the team. We are older and different and yet so much the same. We laughed a lot. We ate. We hugged. We remembered, together. I would recognize them anywhere and in any circumstance. I would trust each one of them with my life. I think that somebody, somewhere must have opened a window last night, because for a few hours, I was surrounded by angels.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged #NursesUnite, ICU nursung, nursing, nursing friendships | 27 Comments

27 Responses

on February 26, 2012 at 1:41 pm | Reply Emma Ann Weatherly

Oh, you dear, sweet woman. Somehow, I think I just knew deep in my heart that you had – somewhere, somehow – in your life developed a true appreciation for diversity, for taking care of others, and for a genuine belief in angels. I have no doubt you are one of the best of the best of those angels. Thank you for sharing your story. You touched my heart and made my day.

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- on February 26, 2012 at 6:35 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  …and thank you, because you just made mine!
  Chris
  
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on February 26, 2012 at 3:37 pm | Reply Jeannie with the big blue bowe

With tears in my eyes, I thank you for your precious words, my friend, Chris. I am so proud to have shared that part of my life with you and all the other “Angels”. It’s a special kind of friend that will “be there” for you when the call of a “code brown” occurs and those friendships last a lifetime. I knew that the inspiration of the time we all shared last night would make a great post for the Minnesota Farm Woman today and indeed it has. Hugs to you.

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- on February 26, 2012 at 6:30 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  ….and hugs back to you! Ah, the code browns….most of the time right before lunch or time to go home. :o)
  love,
  me
  
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on February 26, 2012 at 3:54 pm | Reply Faye Skipper

What a lovely person you are! Indeed! Angels are around all of us, and they are much-needed spirits. Thanks for the sweet article and for your sacrifices!

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- on February 26, 2012 at 6:28 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  …and thank you, Faye. 🙂
  Chris
  
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on February 26, 2012 at 10:18 pm | Reply DD

Chris–Your words never fail to make me laugh or cry or just pause a moment to reflect. Thank you!!

I love you, dear cousin.

DD

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- on February 27, 2012 at 6:20 am | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Me you too!
  chris
  
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on February 27, 2012 at 3:45 pm | Reply Shawn Burkett

My mother used to say that rhyme to me when I was a little girl in Minnesota, while she curled a lock of hair on my forehead: There was a little girl who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very very good. When she was bad she was horrid. 🙂

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on February 27, 2012 at 5:14 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman

My dad used to say that to us, too. :o)
Thanks for reading!
Chris

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on February 27, 2012 at 11:49 pm | Reply Sandy McGonigal

Oh how I wanted to be there with all of you. I read your blog and I was standing right next to you in all those situations. What a wonderful time that was, and the friendships we made have lasted for years. We were a team back then and we knew we could count on each other. I smiled, and laughed through my tears. I hope the next time you come to town I can be there. I am so sorry I missed you this time. Continue to keep in touch. I will always remember that you were the first person I met on that day of my interview with our wonderful boss. Love you.

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- on February 28, 2012 at 8:03 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  We missed you, but understood that you had to work. We were quite a team. Thanks for readingQ xxx ooo love you, too, my friend!
  
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on February 29, 2012 at 5:10 pm | Reply gloria

i am an old …retired r.n…….worked from orthopedics to i.c.u….to pacu….known as recovery room……we also opened windows…i had a patient that had no family…at least any that cared….so he was our own….when he died i walked out of the room for something….came back and the window was allready open….night shift ….nobody opened it…..so …we left it open for the day shift…

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- on February 29, 2012 at 5:42 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Thanks for reading and for commenting, Gloria. I have heard that opening the window has been done by nurses for years. I have also had many, many patients nearing the end point to the corner of the ceiling and say they had a loved one there….who says they were wrong?
  Chris
  
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on February 29, 2012 at 5:19 pm | Reply Lisa Smith

That is so true and so beautiful. I am chronically ill and sadly, spend too much time in the hospital. I know how a nurse can change your entire day in there. Comforting, consoling, explaining and making you feel better. And I always marvel at how they handled all their duties with such grace.

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- on February 29, 2012 at 5:39 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Thanks for your kind words, Lisa.
  Chris
  
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on February 29, 2012 at 5:25 pm | Reply Kathy Young

From a disabled ICU Nurse,you are one of a kind!!! Your Heart & Soul was in YOUR JOB!!! We All gave up a lot for our Pt’s~~home,family,sleep & even our own Future Eduction!! I gave my Health & back for my sick patients!!! But you know what~~I would do it ALL over again!!! I LOVE NURSING!! Thank you ~~Kathy

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- on February 29, 2012 at 5:38 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  …and from one nurse to another….thank YOU! ( have a bad back, too.)
  Chris
  
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on March 8, 2012 at 11:28 am | Reply Jim

I am a little slow in reading some of your writings but this one is very special. My mother was a nurse when I was very young and had to step down due to a sight problem. Our daughter is now in the process of changing careers and guess what- you are right the field of nursing. I am going to forward this to her as some days her studies are tough and we keep telling her that the reward is going to be that cap! I know she will appreciate this column. Thanks Chris.

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- on March 9, 2012 at 6:28 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Thank you! This one was special to me, too. :o)
  Chris
  
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on March 18, 2012 at 5:56 am | Reply The Wonderful Yahoo

I teach a course called “Medicine in Narrative and the News” at the University of North Florida in Jacksonville. It’s a writing course for students heading into health professions. Many of them are going into nursing. I am going to have them read this post. I think it will give them great insight about profession. Thanks for writing it.

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- on March 18, 2012 at 6:16 am | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Thank you!
  Chris
  
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on May 6, 2012 at 8:37 am | Reply Mary Havard-McCoy

Awwww, Chris, beautiful! I’ve sat here bawling and will get back to you on a proper reply as quick as I find a handkerchief. I’m glad I didn’t see this in February and March getting ready for Mama’s heart surgery, the nurses would’ve NEVER gotten their work done…

❤ Mary (you know, your long lost sister with the Cakery in the Deep South)…

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- on May 6, 2012 at 12:44 pm | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Awww…thanks….
  
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on September 17, 2015 at 6:51 am | Reply Tara Platt

You are a beautiful human being. I’m so thankful our paths crossed.

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- on September 17, 2015 at 7:29 am | Reply The Minnesota Farm Woman
  
  Awww….thanks. I’m glad, too!
  
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on September 17, 2015 at 11:59 am | Reply Emy Quaal

Oh what a great interesting article; I worked in a hospital for 23 years, I was a Secy not a nurse, but because of my job I learned to meet and know very, very many special and great nurses–I have great respect and admiration for each and every one of you.

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